Perhaps you were still making plans for the future with your partner when they told you it was all over. It can hit like a bolt out of the blue. Or perhaps you’ve been single for what you consider to be way too long already. You want to get back on the dating scene but, as yet, you haven’t found a match.
For some, being single is tough. We see our friends settling down and wish we could have a bit of that. We get it into our heads that, if only we could meet someone, we would feel motivated to make a really go of life. Our problems would all vanish.
Fighting the world on a team with someone else is so much better than braving it alone. However, there is a lot that you can learn about yourself as a singleton. There is a lot to discover. All too often, we’re in a frantic rush to find someone that we miss these lessons.
We rush too quickly into another bad relationship, and are once more left to pick up the pieces. Let’s take a look at 10 lessons everyone who is single needs to learn.
Be Happy
If you can’t bring yourself to be happy while you’re single, you’ll struggle to find happiness in another relationship. Don’t allow yourself to be swamped by negativity during this time. Be happy for others. Be positives. Be grateful for what you have. Let positive energy flood into your life.
Love Yourself
You absolutely must learn to love yourself when you are single. If you can’t learn to love yourself, you’ll find it super hard to ever meet your Prince Charming. Why? Because no Prince Charming is going to even find someone – let alone love them – who doesn’t know how to love themselves. When you give love – even to yourself – you surround yourself with that love. You create an aura. And people see it. They see it and they’re drawn to it. It’s just like in the movies. We’re attracted more to people who love themselves.
Before you complete someone else, you must work on yourself first. No one is going to come along, rescue you and solve all your problems unless you’ve made the effort to at least learn to be comfortable with who you are. It feels good to be loved. So try to love yourself. Be comfortable in your own company. Treat yourself. Praise yourself. Take yourself out for a nice meal!
Life Isn’t Over!
How many of us suffer a bad break up and declare that life is over? It isn’t. This is just the prologue to a new chapter.
Move On From The Past
One of the problems of being single is that it gives us time – often too much time – to dwell on the past. We fixate on past errors and mistakes; wrong choices and bad decisions. We ask ourselves, “what could have been if only I’d …”
It’s much better to use your time-out from the dating scene to lick your wounds and move on from the past. Forget If’s, But’s and Maybes. Other people have moved on in your life, and it’s now time for you to find closure, too. Look ahead to the future. Make new goals. Plan for a fresh start. Forgive, forget and let go.
Being Single Doesn’t Mean You’re A Failure
Too many of us think that, just because we’re single and alone, we’ve failed at life so far. We feel worthless unless we’re with a man, and we’re single because we deserve to be. No man wants to be with us – and rightly so! There is definitely a pressure to be in a relationship, but it is often we ourselves that create this pressure.
We compare ourselves to our friends who are in a relationship and question why we are not. Answer? Because they’re better than us. You don’t need a relationship to validate your existence. Happiness comes from within. Once you understand this, the right man will come into your life.
Don’t Rush Things
Rushing into another relationship for the sake of being in a relationship is a bad idea. Be prepared to wait. Bide your time. This will ensue you’re not attached to some loser when Prince Charming comes along!
Analyse Your Mistakes
When we take a timeout from anything, we should use it to analyse where we went wrong. If you’re newly single, use this time to reflect on your past relationships. Ask yourself why they ended the way they did. Was there something you could have done differently? Could you have been more flexible, perhaps? This kind of self-examination can be difficult, but it needs to be done if we’re to make a better go of our future relationships.
There Is More To Life Than A Relationship
When we’re in a relationship, many of us commit ourselves whole heartedly. That’s perfectly fine. But a lot of us give everything we have got, and forget all about the other aspects of our life. Use your time while single to reconnect with other areas of your life. Realise that you have so much more to offer the world than your love to a man. Discover your passions again, see friends you haven’t seen for a while.
Be Mindful
Lesson number nine is that you should live in the moment. Don’t dwell on the past and don’t worry about the future. Enjoy every second of freedom you have right now. It won’t last!
Things Happen For A Reason
It’s often not something we can accept at the time. We’ve been broken up with, we didn’t want it to happen, and we can’t accept that it happened “for a reason.” However, as we look back on the big moments in our lives, we realise that things truly do happen for a reason.
As one door closes, another one opens. While being singe might not feel so grand right now, remember that this is just another step on your journey through life. It’s preparation for yet another one.
Stay happy!
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